broken and beautiful

Well it's been a minute or two since my last post. If I am quite honest, I just became bored with this blog.  I had run out of things to say or I didn't want to take the time to write down the things I wanted to say and do it well.  I am not really sure of the reason, but I want to get back to blogging if only for the catharsis that it is for me.  Writing these things down, or typing these things out rather, is a form of confession and healing for me.  I read James 5:16 today, and it says (in my words) that confessing our sins to others is healing for us; therefore, I am just trying to apply medicine to my wounds through this blog.

What confession must I make today?  Well today I am broken.  I am broken hearted for my cousins who are more like brothers that are mourning the loss of their mother.  My heart aches for my mother who has lost yet another sibling and for my Papaw who has buried yet another child...

For my aunt still finding her way after tragedy struck years ago...
For the family that is grieving the young boy killed in the car accident...
For my kids at school whose parents choose not to participate their child's life..

The small group that I teach is currently in the middle of a study titled, Lord, Where Are You When Bad Things Happen?  Intellectually, I can affirm that God is good and that there is a purpose to our pain, and it is to this truth that I grasp, white-knuckled when things turn tragic.  But the pain is still there, and my heart still aches.  Tears still fall.  I have never really been able to wrap my head around death - its not fathomable to me that people that were laughing on the front porch one day can be gone the next.

So tonight I am seeking healing - confessing these things to you and spending some much needed alone time on my porch in my chair my Papaw built for me.

And I am reminiscing on the past week. While it has been one of those weeks that just hurts, it has also been one of those weeks where my heart has been filled.  My cousins chose our church for the visitation and funeral for my Aunt, and I must admit I was apprehensive.  Grief and family are two things I keep private from the rest of the world, and here we were about to open an extremely private matter up to people who don't normally see that side of me.  Please don't get me wrong, I love my church dearly.  I just don't trust too many people with the big things.  But please let me tell you that I am so glad we were home at CrossPointe this past week - the entire staff and family were so incredibly giving and kind to my family.  It was a truly beautiful mixture of my family and my church family.  They ministered so beautifully to my grief-stricken family, and I am beyond grateful.

To the people who ran sound, cooked meals, cleaned up after us, made many pots of coffee, and preached the service - we are so thankful for you.  Words will never suffice for how blessed we are by CrossPointe Community Church.

It is during times of crisis, that we put pen to paper to attempt to make sense of our world.  Tonight, I am not sure if any of this makes sense, but I hope, somehow, it helps.

sweet summer time

Well the summer is coming to an end - a fact which makes me super sad!  In honor of the ending of summer I thought I would share with you some of my most favorite things from this summer!

1.  I am in love with this song and the band - both are just insane!  Check them out!


2.  The Farmer's Market in Laurel!  It's so great to get to know some of the local artisans and farmers and to get some fresh/homemade goodies!  Its been great!  And it proceeds the Downtown Movie Night which is free and family friendly!  I just love Laurel in the summer!

Photo courtesy of Laurel Main Street Facebook

3.  Hanging out with #littlegirl - even though she can drive me crazy like nobody else!  I have chronicled our adventures on Instagram!  This summer we also have had some good sister time with Brit - she is a super busy mom of 3 beautiful children so some quality Beaty girl sister time is rare but needed!

3.  I have been made the Preschool Coordinator at our church, and I am so excited about the things we are doing in our children's department this fall!  If you don't have a home church, come visit CrossPointe Church in Laurel!  In preparation, I have been reading this awesome book - you need to check it out!

4.  Reuniting with some old friends!  

5.  We took this summer off, and honestly it has been one of the best things ever!  It has been a great time to regroup and refocus!  I am so thankful for this summer and the breath of fresh air it has been!

I hope all you have had a great summer!

a little workout story

I am so incredibly blessed to be a part of our church - to be constantly challenged to be who God created me to be and to be reminded that I must align myself with God's Word in order to do that is just one of those things that I am so grateful for.  I really don't know how anyone can go to church anywhere else.  I don't mean to offend you, but that's how awesome our church is.  I digress...

So this past Sunday, John began a series on Identity - who we are in Christ.  I am a little excited.  Don't tell him, but he has kinda been rocking the Sermon series as of late. Who really preaches on the Zombie Apocalypse and doesn't turn it into a "turn or burn" yelling match at minute 5?  Really?  Yeah - he does and it's pretty incredible, so stop reading right now and go watch the sermons.  Go.  Now!  You may return when you have finished.

So identity - who we are in Christ.  That's a big idea for me, and I have to break it down to wrap my head around it.  I began with this relationship thing which, for me, looks like Kay Arthur studies to help guide me in studying the Word and spending time with Him.  (Side note - I have a pretty incredible Bible study partner who is also from my church!!!)  It takes some time, but I begin to see little things coming out in the way I live due to what I was studying.  We built walls with Nehemiah, fought battles courageously with Joshua, understood more of the cycle of behavior of the Israelites with the Judges, was inspired by the excellence of character of Ruth, etc.

One of the things that I was convicted quite strongly about was the idea of Biblical femininity of Esther, Ruth, Debra, etc which begins with balance - something I continue to struggle with everyday.  So breaking it down further, I began with something I could tackle - my weight.  Candace and I joined a gym in March, and we have been going 5-6 days per week since.  It's difficult for me to see a difference, but I know the very real difference in the way I feel.  I feel like the difference I feel and see is part of Christ being lived out in my life in a very real and practical way.  I don't want to be super skinny or crazy ripped workout girl - I just want to be a good steward of my body.  I want who I am and my reputation to give a correct estimation of who He is in my life. I don't pretend that I am perfect at this, but my point is that He is working on me! I am sharing this with you to hopefully inspire you and provide a little more accountability.  If I can do the workout thing - anyone can!

Progress so far!

More to come!  Have a great week - as we all know I have become that girl that only posts about once a week!  

Much Love,

Colie

weekend wrap-up

So sorry about the silence around here lately - Candace and I have started working out every morning at 5 a.m. which means we go to bed with the chickens.  Hence the blog silence because most of these are written between the hours of 10 p.m. and midnight.  I am working on beginning a new routine moving those late night jobs to early morning jobs!  So now that you are full of my excuses, I thought I would update you on this weekend - Easter weekend.  It was chopped full of so many good things - it is probably one of my favorite times of the year!

The first was on Good Friday and was called "Ascend the Hill" at our church - it is just amazing.  I am still speechless - such a creative way to pause and remember the sacrifice Christ made on the cross.  The event began in the Sanctuary with a beautiful skit based on this one from The Skit Guys and then moved outside to the property to a self-guided tour through the events of Good Friday - the garden, the trial, the scourging, the mocking, and the crucifixion.  Can I tell you it is probably the most moving event I have ever experienced?  You know there are quite a few times when our church does things that make me think I could not love it anymore than I do in that moment, and then we do something else completely unexpected and wonderful again - it's a never ending process for me.  I just love my church - if you don't have a church home, come visit CrossPointe!  

On Saturday, we all went to Mom and Dad's house for dying eggs, hunting of said eggs, decorating the bunny cake, hanging out the three coolest kids ever, and some sister time!    

                                                                             

last pic is courtesy of Candace

Of course Sunday was Easter, and I didn't get a single picture!  Suffice to say it was a beautiful, joyful, and exciting service at CrossPointe followed by lunch at Papaw's, round-table therapy, and front-porch sitting!  I am super blessed to be a part of this community of believers and part of an incredible family!  I hope you all had a blessed Easter Weekend!

Much Love, 

Colie

happy and merry

Well it's officially cold now in south MS, and it's officially the day after Christmas.  Figures!

Anyways, we had our family Christmas celebration on Sunday so that we could all celebrate with Papaw, spend as much time together as possible, and not have to rush off to another holiday get together.  It was a perfectly lovely day that began at church with Christmas brunch.

I kind of love the simple decorations - made the paper christmas trees thanks to Pinterest for inspiration.  We followed it up with our usual trip to Papaw's for Sunday lunch.

Madi is growing so fast - I can't believe little girl is four now!  After lunch we went to Mom and Dad's for present time that went by so quickly that I didn't get a picture.  Madi said, "this was the best Christmas ever."  I have to agree with her.  When it got dark we all went for a stroll in Mason Park.  Borrowed this pic from Brit!

Yesterday,  Candace and I went to Mom and Dad's because of the weather, and you're always safer at your parents' house.  It makes even the worst things better!  We were very blessed not to have any terribly severe weather in our little community, and I pray all of you were safe.  So I will just leave you with this!

Oh and btw, a few changes coming to the blog in new year.  I think it's time for a little structure!

coffee and Bibles

Okay friends, well Candace and I have entered the crazy hectic haze that is known as the 2 months leading up to Christmas!  You know what I am talking about - you dig your heels in, put on your running shoes, attach the coffee I.V., and prepare not to breath until after New Years - we are almost to the I.V.

However, that is not the point of this pretty post!  I have to tell you a story - I know right, it's so exciting!  So, a few months ago I volunteered to lead a small group in our home for our church, and this particular group is geared towards the female of our species.  This particular small group is one I am pretty excited about which is why I was a little sad when no one came.  Then Shelly Reid, our Small Group Coordinator Extraordinaire, shared with me that statistically the small group that is the most difficult to establish is one for single women.  How crazy is that?  Then, because I am a nerd, I googled some statistics about small groups and found that people in America in general have become less social, even stating that active membership is local clubs and organizations has decreased by almost HALF! That seems a little crazy to me, and believe me, I know the importance of time at home and just with your family!

So I say all of that to let you know that I really, really, really want you to come to our small group or to a similar small group in your area.  However, I know that you probably don't care about the statistics but about the story so here it goes...

I became a believer at a very young age (5ish), but I was never really discipled.  People in my church and my parents encouraged me to study the Bible and to live a godly lifestyle; however, I really didn't know where to start or what a godly lifestyle looked like.  I mean I tried having a "quiet time," but that didn't really work for me because once again, what the heck is a "quiet time?"

Things changed for me when I was in college at Jones County Junior College.  The wife of the director of the Baptist Student Union asked me and a few other girls if we would like to be involved with a girl's Bible study in her home.  I tried it out, and it completely revolutionized my world.  Oh, it was like she gave me a key that opened so many doors in my world.

She taught us a way to study the Bible - she used studies written by Kay Arthur, and by learning more about Christ through the studies, I did not find simple answers but a place to find answers and a method to gather answers.  I also learned that I dislike quiet times and benefit best from an "un-quiet time" as I study best when the television is on and music is playing, and I learned a study method that provided, predominantly, direction mixed with some valuable insights into Scripture.

I must tell you it changed my life.  And it was not just the studies - the community I found in that group of girls is still one of my fondest memories from my entire college experience.  We laughed and cried together, we supported and challenged each other, and we prayed together and for each other.  We lived life together - we knew things about each other that no one else knew.  There is something so precious about gathering in a home with a cup of coffee and opening up the Scripture with people who are experiencing some of the very same struggles and joys as you are or who have already walked that path and can offer priceless, godly advice.

This is my prayer for our small group - that we experience that balance of garnering knowledge of our God and gleaning the many benefits of living this life in community with other believers!  And along the way I hope we laugh, cry, pray, discuss, agree, disagree and drink lots of coffee!

I pray to see you in small group this Wednesday at 6:30 at our apartment!!!