all of a sudden, i miss everyone!

Sometimes it's easy to feel like you're the only one in the world who's struggling, who's frustrated, or unsatisfied at barely getting by. But, that feeling is a lie and if you just hold on; just find the courage to face it all for another day, someone or something will find the way and make it all okay. Because we all need a little help sometimes, someone to help us hear the music in the world. To remind us that it won’t always be this way. That someone is out there, and that someone will find you.

The past few days have just been kind of blah... lacking inspiration and purpose.  I am not sure what brings on these days or these feelings, but I am sure that I absolutely loathe these feelings.  It is days like these when I want one more hug from my Mamaw, one more chance to sit around the kitchen table and laugh with her and my mom and my sisters.  The past few days have felt like spring, and perhaps that is why these few days have been difficult.  Spring was her favorite time of year - she loved any and every flower and many of my fondest memories of my childhood feature a backdrop of a garden, a bowl of peas to be shelled, or a massive amount of flowers to be planted and creatively placed throughout the yard.  Looking back, hindsight is always 20/20, she always was doing something purposefully and creatively.  She cooked to show love and compassion through a meal.  She made quilts and pillow cases and table cloths because a girl would need those to start a home with and I suspect to leave us with a very special piece of her.  

It is easy to become wrapped up in  these feelings to the point that I feel very alone at times, but there are so many people that suffer these same feelings of grief, loss, and an inexplicable need for your life to matter because it mattered to her.  Most days I just miss her love, her light, and her warmth that, when combined, could make life make sense.  My mother gets more and more like her every day, and between the two of them, it is not long before I find my inspiration and purpose.  She and my Papaw would have been married 59 years when she passed, and my Mom and Dad will have been married 32 years this August.  The numbers alone make for a pretty incredible love story and there are fairy tale elements to both.  A love that lasts, a love that means work, a love that is the basis for a firm foundation.  I want to be like her, and I want a love like that.


catch my breath

Whew! I feel like I have been running these past couple of weeks at a frantic pace and nothing I need to do is getting done.  However, I am trying to take small breaks where I can and just breathe - it's difficult as I am sure most of you know.  After Christmas, it seems like the second semester starts with all gears going and doesn't stop until you wake up and realize it's time to buy the Thanksgiving Turkey again.  Okay, I digress.  I have been remiss not to share with you some of the things I have been learning lately!

A sweet friend/fellow nerd - Shelly Reid and I have been doing a Bible Study on Ezra, Nehemiah, and Esther.  Just let me tell you, it has rocked my world.  As you all know by now, the nerdy things in life and in the Bible just really excite me because sometimes it feels like God has kinda thrown in all these things just for me to try to figure out.  I know that's completely off and self-centered; however, it is nice to learn through all this study that He created me this way and understands how my head works.  Okay back to the point - the things I have learned.  There are so many, and I know I will leave some out but here it goes.

1. God stirs the heart of those He chooses to use to accomplish His goals and plans.  AND as I have found out  that person may not even know that God is the one doing that!  Don't believe me, go check out what Isaiah says about Cyrus! Blew my mind!  Don't miss this - HE STIRS YOUR HEART!  Those things that you just feel like you must do or burst could possibly be God stirring your heart!  Isn't that amazing?  

2.  When, not if, you do these things that God is stirring your heart to do you must know a few things - pray.  The past few weeks we have been in Nehemiah and throughout Nehemiah you find his prayers scattered through.  And it's not grand, lengthy prayers - it's short, one sentence like a breath out of his heart.  Also this is a big one - the enemy will try to stop you!  The enemy may take several forms but it's always the same tactics so know them and know  the Truth!  It will save you quite a bit of heartache!

3.  Oh I can't forget - Nehemiah's stirring is to rebuild the walls of Jerusalem.  Guess what, we all have walls we need to return to, to rebuild, and to restore (I borrowed that from Shelly).  Your wall effects everything - it's your faith, your prayers, knowing the Truth, everything! If that wall is not in tact then those tactics of the enemy will penetrate and possible cause some destruction.

4.  God has been stirring my heart to do something quite outside my comfort zone and big!  It's in the works as I type and you read, but I can't tell you much right now!  Hopefully I will be sharing more about this in the future!  I would appreciate your prayers!

5.  Finally, my life has been so very blessed doing this one-on-one Bible study.  I encourage you to find someone perhaps older (physically or spiritually or both) to do Bible Study with.  It's amazing how encouraging it is, AND in Titus 2 we are actually commanded to always be learning so that we may be able to teach those who are younger!

So as always I pray this encouraged you and thank you for allowing me to take a breath to organize my thoughts a little bit!  Have a wonderful day!


twenty - eight

So this past December, I turned 28.  I know all the jokes – in my late 20’s, getting really close to the big 30, etc!  Well I have decided to celebrate this getting older thing as I don’t see it as a bad thing.  Unless you know something about this aging process that I don’t, most people get older!  Most people say to look at a girl’s mother to see what she will be like when she gets older, and if that is true then I am truly blessed.  I believe that my mom has only continued to become more beautiful inside and out the older she gets.  So in honor of this milestone – I have made a list because I so love lists! 

28 Things To Do While I am 28 
(in no particular order)
1.        Go on a road trip – preferably up the east coast
2.       Live a RADICAL life for Christ!
3.       Tithe RADICALLY
4.       Be a better steward of what I have been given.
5.       Be more hospitable – we have been blessed with a great apartment and I feel like we need to share!
6.       Make a quilt! Or two or three.
7.       Open my heart again and maybe fall in love.
8.       Go on a mission trip!
9.       Design something new for A Daisy A Day.
10.   Grow our business.
11.   Plant a balcony sized vegetable/herb/flower pot garden!
12.   Read a few classic novels that I have never read, such as the ones on this list!
13.   Buy a sewing machine!
14.   Use the sewing machine and complete a project!
15.   Go to Blue Mountain College (my alma mater) for Homecoming – I haven’t been back since I graduated in 2007.
16.   Get a second tattoo.
17.   Become healthier – seriously!
18.   Take care of student loans!  One I can already mark off! Yes!
19.   Go with Candace to get her first tattoo!
20.   Subscribe to the local paper and read it!
21.   Continue to grow in my faith – more discipline!
22.   Get a free, natural tan!
23.   Spend some quality time with old friends!
24.   Make a DIY project for our apartment at least once a month!
25.   Apply again for a teaching job!
26.   Get rid of things I don’t need in order to live a simpler life!
27.   Go to the beach for at least a week this summer!
28.   Stop biting my nails!

Okay so you can follow me on Pinterest - I have a board dedicated to ideas surrounding this list! Or you can stay tuned here and I will try to update often concerning the status!